Saturday, September 22, 2018

Her mother's frantic - snippet from #Superhero short story for #WeWriWa

Welcome to another Sunday with Weekend Writing Warriors. Meet writers in various genres and read 8-10 sentence snippets of their stories. Find a new author and sample their work. Enjoy!

I’m running snippets from an unpublished short story in my superhero series. It was originally intended for an anthology that didn’t receive enough submissions. I’m debating whether to expand it into a novella or make an anthology with other short stories. Any suggestions are welcome. 
Sorry for skipping two weeks. Two Sundays ago, I was traveling from London to Atlanta. Last weekend, I was attending a departmental retreat.
The last line was: Estelle slipped into the chair next to Toby.
(Please excuse added semicolons to fit 8-10 sentences.)

He winked at her, “Hi, Star.” His special, lop-sided grin sent her pulse racing.
“What’s up?” she asked.
He nodded toward the younger student, “Problem number one, Gecko’s baby sister is missing.”
“Juliana Rosado’s not really my sister,” Gecko explained, “she’s the seven-year old daughter of a family living in my apartment complex. I’ve kind of adopted Juliana; play ball with her after school. She’s a happy girl, not the type to run away; her mother’s frantic. Cops have been searching for almost a week, and the whole neighborhood’s jittery.” After this uncharacteristically long speech, he shook his head and looked at Toby.
“Yep; know how it is; ain’t easy to lose part of your family,” Toby drawled.

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As always, I’ll be happy to reply to your comments.  
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  1. Oh dear, sounds a bit serious - I hope she's OK.

  2. A week? Oh glory, that's not good statistically. Good snippet, Aurora.

    1. I'm sure you're correct. She is alive - I prefer happy endings.

  3. I hope they are able to help find the missing girl!

    1. Well, that is the goal of the story. And, Toby doesn't like to fail.

  4. Adoption is always a good thing, I was adopted myself.

    1. It is good, and often due to the generosity of adoptive parents.

  5. I sense that Gecko will be getting a lot of support for finding this girl. Good luck to them!

    1. Toby's team are mostly people he has rescued in one way or another. Gecko was a street kid before Toby recruited him into the secret supers.

  6. Lots of excitement and concern in this snippet. Well done.

  7. Scary situation any time a child goes missing, can't wait to see what will happen next! Enjoyed the snippet, really draws the reader into the scene...

  8. Nice set up, Aurora! Pulls you right in to the problem. Characters already well defined in just this snippet.

  9. Every person's worst nightmare - missing child.

  10. Makes me wonder about the circumstances of her disappearance that the team is getting involved in the search.